Sunday, June 3, 2012
there are too many goodbyes awaiting me this month. they are goodbyes that will bring a sense of emptiness, unexpected change (when things were feeling really stable) and a set of challenges i'm not sure i'm up for. i have no choice but to release, regroup and soldier on. i'm beginning to sound like a broken record here. is this the story of my life? release, regroup and soldier on? i must be missing some steps here because the universe keeps requiring me to practice this same dance over and over again.
and once again, i feel like i am the understudy who really is not that interested in doing the dancing (more the concept of the dance, the story, the stage, the show, the fanciful props), who dodged more than one rehearsal and is not fully prepared and quite terrified to step into the role of première danseuse.
so today i find grace in words from those i love and admire. words about courage and acceptance. words about putting on my brave face, stepping on stage and dancing my ass off. it may not be the performance they came for, the choreography may be more impulsive than precise, but there will be daring leaps and twirls and the costumes will blow their minds.
"i love the phrase 'i am not afraid!' maybe it's the best phrase we can say, other than 'i have everything I need.' maybe they are the same."
“to be fully alive, fully human, and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest.”
"you are the first one of your kind."